Dental Fiction

Toothtown Football American and European

Get the best of both worlds with this unique coloring book that covers American football teams from the NFL and European soccer (football) teams. Enjoy a wide variety of sports-themed coloring pages catering to both American and international sports enthusiasts. Explore a rich collection of coloring pages featuring your favorite NFL teams and iconic European […]

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Toothache at Big Mouth Bend

Toothache At Big Mouth Bend

Once upon a time, a long time ago, there was the valley of Big Mouth Bend. Big Mouth Bend had a lush landscape of celery trees and spinach grass. Clear blue skies and wide-open prairie. In the middle of this lush valley was the town of Gumm. Its people were happy and prosperous. Sheriff T. Paste kept the little town orderly and clean. But… every once in a while…

“Sheriff! Sheriff! You gotta come quick the Cavity Gang is at it again. They just robbed the town bank and got away with 500 enamels.” cried the town banker.
“Don’t worry none Mr. White. I’ll get ‘em.” assured Sheriff Paste.
So the Sheriff rode out on his horse and chased down the Cavity Gang. Ginger, Tarter, and Plaque were female triplets and they were always causing trouble. They didn’t like the town of Gumm. It was just too clean for their taste. Usually they just dug holes in peoples’ lawns, and graffitied the walls; but robbing the 1st Baby Tooth Bank was just plain low down.
Sheriff Paste soon caught up with them. He recovered the money and chased the Cavity Gang away. Sheriff Paste was greeted by a warm and cheering crowd, as he rode back into town with the town’s money.
“Here ya go Mr. White. Just like I promised.” smiled Sheriff Paste, as he handed the money back to Mr. White.
“Thank you Sheriff. You are a true credit to this community.” praised Mr. White.
“Aw twer’nt nothing.” laughed the Sheriff.
“Sheriff he’s right. Without you around, the Cavity Gang would turn this town to rot.” commended Mayor Molar, as he patted the sheriff on the back. “Come on down to the saloon and let me buy you a drink.”
“Sure thing Mayor. It’d be my honor.” accepted Sheriff Paste.
The bartender, Braces, greeted them as they came in the door.
“Hey Braces, give the Sheriff a shot of the new stuff.” recommended Mr. White.
“New Stuff? You mean there’s something new besides water and milk in this here bar?” asked Sheriff Paste.
“Sure is, but its powerful stuff. So be careful.” warned Mr. White.
“Here you go Sheriff.” said Braces, as he gave the Sheriff his drink.
Sheriff Paste looked at the drink. Sheriff sniffed at it first. It even smelled strong. Then he took a sip. It set his mouth on fire.
“Oh Boy! That stuff will kick you in the teeth. What’s it called?” complained Sheriff Paste.
“Lysterine.” chuckled Braces. “That there is the drink of Men.”
“Or something to take the paint off of fences.” choked Sheriff Paste.
“Ha ha ha ha.” they laughed.
And so it was in the town of Gumm. Law and Order ruled the day. But that was all about to change.

It was a dark and moonless night when the Cavity Gang visited Farmer Carnivore’s Ranch. They snuck in all quiet like and went straight for the barn.
“Shh, nice and quiet now girls. Get them cows loaded.” whispered Ginger.
“I don’t get it, Ginger.” questioned Tartar. “Why are we stealing cows?”
“Boss said to get the cows because we failed to get the money from the bank. Boss says we need capital.” explained Ginger.
“We gots a capital.” said Tartar. “The city of Roots ain’t that far away.”
“Not that kind of capital, dummy.” scolded Ginger.
“You girls quit jaw’n and load them cows up.” ordered Plaque.
“Quit your nagging Plak. We’re almost done.” said Ginger.

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Tale of Two Teeth

The Tale of Two Teeth

Once upon a time, two little teeth lived in very different cities. One tooth lived in Left Mandible, a very clean city. The teeth were brushed every day. The gums were flossed every day. And Sheriff Paste kept the peace by never letting the cavity gang into town.
However, on the other side of Tongue Mountain, The Right Mandible was a very dirty city, and it smelled. It was never brushed. It was never flossed. The cavity gang lived here and took their orders from the Mayor Gum D. Seas. His sister Tuth D. Kaye ran the police department and she was as corrupted as her brother.
One day, a little tooth name Wright dared to cross the Tongue Mountain. He saw that the city was dirty, but he also saw that the teeth of that dirty city get to eat candy and drink soda anytime they wanted.
“Man, that’s so cool they get soda and candy anytime they want. They don’t have to brush and they don’t have to floss. I wish I could live there.”
So Wright decided that he would sneak into the city and see what this bad city life was like. He soon ran into Rong.
“Who are you and why are you so clean?” asked Rong.
“I’m Wright and I live in the city to the west over the Tongue Mountain.”
“Whoa, is it as clean there as you are?” asked Rong, full of curiosity.
“Yes, the teeth are brushed every day and the gums are flossed,” told Wright. “It’s all so…strict.”
“Cool, I wish I could see that.”
“Go ahead. You just go that way.”
So Wright told Rong how to get to his clean town of Left Mandible. Rong thanked Wright and was about to leave when Gingivitis of the cavity gang stopped him.
“Where are you going Rong?” she asked him.
“Oh hi Ginger. Um…nowhere. I was just going to take a little trip.”
“Yah, I overheard you and the boy talking. So you’re going to go over the mountain huh. Well, then you won’t mind doing me a little favor.”
“Like what?”
“I want you to take this package with you.” She told him.
“What is it?” asked Rong.
“Never you mind. Just set it down on the edge of town when you enter and my sister Plaque will be along to pick it up.”
“I don’t know.” he hesitated.
“Do it or I’ll tell Mayor D. Seas that you left town without a passport.”
“OK. OK, I’ll do it.”
“Good, and don’t worry nothing bad will happen. I promise.” She smiled at him.
And so Rong went to the town of Left Mandible on the other side of the Tongue Mountain. He sat the package down at the edge of town and he walked into the city. Almost immediately, he was stopped by the Center of Disease Control.
“Hold it.” demanded the guard.
“What’s wrong?” asked Rong, fearing that he was caught already.
“What’s wrong? You’re filthy. Before we let you into the city, you need to be decontaminated. We can’t have germs getting into the city. They cause too much havoc.”
“Oh.”
“Don’t worry; we’ll have you cleaned in no time. Follow me.” said the guard.

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Cavities of the Caribbean – Hardcover

Chapter 1

Sit ye down and I’ll tell ye a tale of the old pirate captain Black Tooth. He was a mean and salty dog that took great pleasure in sinking the great enamel ships of good King Crown.

It was a dark and stormy night as we sailed upon the high seas. The wind howled like an angry wolf as it beat against our sails. The rain fell in torrent abandonment and the sky roared with thunder and lightning.
I was busily tying down our cargo when I heard a yell from above.
“Ship Ahoy!!”
I wondered who else could be out on such a night as this and I hurried topside to see. In between the lightning flashes, I could just see the dark sails of another ship. And my soul filled with dread as I recognized that ship’s colors. I had heard many tales of this ship and its sugar thirsty crew; but I never thought I’d ever see her with my own eyes.
It was the dreaded ship of Captain Black Tooth that shadowed in our wake.
“Black Tooth! It’s Captain Black Tooth!!” shouted our lookout, frightened with fear.
“Oh no, that and this devil of a storm too! Hoist the sails men and we’ll try to use the winds to outrun them!” shouted our Captain above the din of the sea.
We hastily hoisted the sails and tried to make a run for it; but Black Tooth’s ship seemed to just glide over the waters as they got ever closer. And soon…
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
We were being fired upon.
“Return fire!” ordered the Captain.
Me and my mate Douglass rushed to load the cannons as the ship was tossed by the raging storm.
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
We returned fire on Black Tooth’s ship. I fell down and slid across the deck more than once trying to load our cannons with gunpowder and cannon balls. And the sound of the thunder’s roar only added to the fierceness of the cannon fire.
“Captain! We’re on fire! The mast is burning!” yelled our helmsman.
“Put those fires out! If we lose the mast, we’ll be lost at sea for sure!”
It was now that Black Tooth’s ship pulled along side us and his barbaric crew boarded our ship. They shouted horrible snide remarks and taunts as they quickly subdued and rounded up our crew.
“Your mother wears combat boots!”
“Did you dress yourself in the dark?!”
“I’ve seen better heads on cabbage and beer!”
And though my Captain and crew fought bravely, we were all captured. There was nothing I could do. We were all made to get on our knees with our hands on our heads. I could only kneel and watch as my Captain faced off against theirs.

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